I asked my mother for her take on my diagnosis because the
diagnosis of Cystic Fibrosis can affect family and friends, as well. It turns
out she had written out her story in September, 2000, when I was about seven
years old. I was then allowed to read this perspective. Even at that point, the
diagnosis was pretty recent. She recalls the phone call.
“Mrs. Wilson?”
“Yes?”
“We have the test results for Ariel.”
“Yes?”
“They are positive, Mrs. Wilson.”
I sink to the floor, nearly dropping the
phone. “Mrs. Wilson?” an anxious voice asks.
“Yes,” I manage to choke out.
“I'm sorry. Do you want me to put you in
touch with the local clinic?”
“Yes. Please,” I reply, slightly stunned.
“We'll notify Ariel's doctor, you'll
probably hear from them soon,” the voice continues.
“Thank you,” is all I can squeak out as the
tears start falling.
The initial
shock could knock a person out for a while. My mother didn’t have a lot of
information at that point, only that her daughter had it and that it was going
to be a big deal in our lives. Her research gave her everything. That’s pretty
overwhelming for a mother to handle. She struggled with the diagnosis along
with me for a while. She writes:
I was hard, at
first, to talk about it. People wanted to know about it, but they were hesitant
to ask, or were afraid they would ask the 'wrong' question. For a while,
emotions were a bit raw, but it was easier to talk about it than to keep it to
ourselves. When people understood that they were not going to offend me in some
way by asking questions, others are more open to talk about Ariel's situation.
Although Ariel isn't interested in telling other kids her own age about CF, she
'puts up with' me talking with other adults about it. I have always shown Ariel
the respect of asking if it's ok before I talk to others about things. At
first, she didn't want anything said, so that made it hard for me. There were
even times she became quite upset with me for talking about her situation when
she was around, even with family. I'm grateful to those who were understanding
if I cut myself off due to Ariel's request, or her obvious displeasure. But
time changes everything. CF has become part of our lives now, so it's not so
hard to get that permission.
I’d been
diagnosed for about a year and some change at the time this was written. My
mother shares this experience from looking back at the situation with new
knowledge and with hope for the future. One can only imagine how hard it would
be in the moment to see hope for the future. We all hurt in some way over the
information, my mother most of all. She made sacrifices and did her best to
make sure I handled it well also.
This is my beautiful family who puts up with all those things I deal with, too. |
For those of
you struggling with how to handle such a diagnosis, for yourself or a loved
one, you can read an article my family and I got to help write for The Family
Magazine of Michiana. This is the link:
There is always someone who understands
out there. It’s not easy to handle the diagnosis, but nobody is ever stranded
with such knowledge.
Keep Hope,
Cystic Sister @----